By Violet Auma – Kakamega || violetmedia8@gmail.com
What should have been a solemn goodbye to a beloved son in Lwandeti village turned into a storm of emotion, cultural defiance, and physical confrontation all triggered by one man of the cloth.
On a grey, chilly morning in Matete, Kakamega County, mourners gathered to pay their final respects to 28-year-old Kitali Kundu.
Grief hung heavily in the air. But just as hearts were beginning to settle, tension began to rise.
At the centre of the storm was the pastor, a man entrusted with leading the community through moments of pain, but who on this day, would leave that trust shattered.
Joseph Wafula, father to the deceased, had rehearsed his words all night. His heart was full, his grief still fresh.
As per the burial program and traditions, he was to give a tribute a farewell only a parent can give. But just as he prepared to walk up, the pastor stopped him.
“He told me only the widow would speak,” Wafula recalls, his voice thick with emotion. “But in our culture, a daughter-in-law or in-law does not speak before the parents of the deceased. It’s disrespectful.”
Murmurs rippled through the crowd. Tradition had been tossed aside and many were not having it.
What followed was nothing short of bewildering. The pastor climbed atop the fresh mound of soil at the graveside and began cursing the deceased’s family — a move that instantly ignited outrage among mourners.
“He began declaring that the young man died because of a family curse… that his death was spiritual punishment,” a mourner said.
For many, it was a cruel twist — words that reopened fresh wounds instead of offering comfort. The crowd’s mood shifted. The mourning gave way to murmurs, then shouts… then chaos.
Tempers flared. Some shouted. Others advanced toward the pastor. And then, fists flew.
“We didn’t plan for violence,” said one attendee, “but the way he spoke to the family on such a day was unacceptable. He had to go.”
The church’s sound system was smashed. The pastor, visibly shaken, was beaten and dragged out by angry mourners.
In silence, without hymns or prayers, the family picked up the pieces of the interrupted funeral and buried their loved one — not in the way they had planned, but with dignity born of heartbreak.
“We buried him without the church. They failed us,” Mzee Wafula said quietly, staring into the ground where his son now rests.
The incident has sparked debate far beyond Lwandeti. What happens when religion collides with culture? Who gets to decide how we honor the dead?
Moses Naibei Masai, a respected elder in the community, believes it’s time for dialogue.
“Funerals are sacred not just to the church, but to our heritage. The church must walk with the community, not ahead of it. If there’s no mutual respect, these conflicts will keep happening.”
At the time of publishing, the church involved has not issued an official statement. But residents are demanding answers and assurances that such disruptions will not repeat.
As Kitali’s family continues to mourn, they also carry a new burden, the pain of a farewell marred by conflict, and the lingering question: When grief meets belief, who should bend?
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